"What we have here is a failure to communicate."
– Captain in "Cool Hand Luke"

Our brains are solution machines. If you're talking and your co-conversant says, "X keeps happening" your brain jumps into solution mode. "Why is that? What can be done? Have you tried Y?"
In normal conversation, this may not be a problem. Especially if we're comfortable with the person we're talking to or have a level of trust present.
In your business development conversations, on the other hand, it can be a problem. When our brains hears what sounds like a problem, it stops listening and starts looking for a solution. "We use Competitor X," shuts the listening down and starts the brain into solution mode. "Maybe you're unhappy? Maybe they charge you too much? Maybe they don't do exactly what we can do for you?"
What the best sales people do sounds simple, but it's hard to do. As the Good Book says, they seek first to understand. When they hear what sounds like a problem, they fight the urge to go into solution mode and keep listening. "Talk to me about that," they might say, "why did you bring that up right now?"
In my workshops we talk about Developing the Opportunity and active listening is the featured skill. Is the presence of a competitor a problem? In the opportunity phase it's hard to say. Knowing that, don't waste the brain power on solving the problem. Focus your brain on understanding the person in front of you.
Last night, a friend talking about one of her soon-to-be-ex-co-workers said, "I told her where I'm going to work, then she went off on a weird tangent and made all sorts of disturbing assumptions." The soon-to-be-ex-co-worker was doing what we all do. She jumped into solution mode. The problem was there wasn't a problem needing to be solved.
Who knows what's going on in people's heads? Not me. The only way to find out is to ask questions, and listen. Turn off the solutions, focus on the diagnosis, the understanding. There will be plenty of time for solutions later, if they're needed at all.
Good stuff.
|