Can – you – dig it?!?

I know, I tell too many tales about my adventures in handy-man-ness, but these days I'm not alone in pretending to be self-sufficient. Many of us are ticking off a decades old list of projects. My latest: the sprinkler system.
A few years ago I watched some talented landscapers fix a sprinkler line damaged while planting our peach tree. (Side note: when the tree was planted my bride said we'd have 50+ peaches in a few years. I scoffed. The tree was skinny, and we've had exactly one edible peach in the last two years. I made a comment and she said, just wait. Sure enough, there are easily 80 small fruits out there. I am humbled, yet again.) Anyway, I watched the landscapers, asked a few questions, thinking, "I could do that."
Last fall I bought a bunch of new sprinkler heads for the front yard, fixed some, and it kind of worked. Confident, last weekend I went to work on the backyard. Eight holes, eight new sprinkler heads. Water everywhere. It's amazing.
The only problem I had was with hole #7. It's near one of the big trees and I met a little resistance under the grass. "Root," I thought and stomped the shovel a little harder to break through. So as not to damage the sprinkler, I finished the hole by hand with my trowel and fingers. This is when I notice the resistance was not a root, but a newly severed orange wire. A single copper strand. Coming from who knows where, going to goodness knows where. It's near the back of my yard, a mystery. I waited to hear a neighbor complain. Checked that night to see if lights were out. Nothing.
Mid-week, Wilson the ABC is yelling a lot and I see some guys working on a telephone pole opposite the cut wire side of the yard. I walk out, get the dog, and casually ask what they're up to.
"Just upgrading your neighbor's cable," he said. "Do you need anything from us?"
"No," I say. "Just making sure the dog's not bothering you or anything."
He takes a look at me and Wilson from his post on the ladder. I think he knows we're up to something.
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